


Sleepless

by joufancyhuh



Series: In The Age of Dragons [9]
Category: Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Canon Divergence, F/M, Nonwarden cousland, One-Shot, train of thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 14:37:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8988082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joufancyhuh/pseuds/joufancyhuh
Summary: Alistair had to tell her the truth eventually, right?





	

**Author's Note:**

> _How much longer would he wait to tell her?_

He couldn’t sleep. Truth was, he hadn’t been able to rest since the group started towards Redcliffe. Idrina slept peaceful, tucked under his right arm, oblivious to the cacophony of thoughts in his head. He kept waiting for her to notice something off, a crack in his smile or a darkness that penetrated his gaze, something that could help him bring up the subject of “Hey, guess what? I’m a Prince.” She hadn’t yet, or maybe she ignored it, insisting to herself that it was a simple trick of the light.

How much longer would he wait to tell her? He lasted this long, but he knew Eamon would give it away, something stupid like, “Why don’t you be King, Alistair?” She deserved to hear this from him; he owed her that much. Would she be angry? Hurt?

He wouldn’t be able to handle it if she was hurt. He had always hidden his bloodlines from people. With time, it just easier to keep this from her, from all of them. They saw him as Alistair, nothing more, and that suited him fine. He _was_ nothing more but Idrina saw greatness in him, and he knew, without a doubt, that she would push to put him on the throne. He didn’t want that, never did.

It was nice, to know that everyone in the group didn’t work to appease him, didn’t like him just because he was Maric’s son. Being only Alistair suited him fine. But now it was time to end this. How did one bring up something like that anyway? “By the way, I’m Maric’s bastard son, just in case anyone was wondering.” Where did he go from here?

Idrina broke his train of thoughts with a whimper. Fenn lifted his head from the other side of her body and licked her hand while Alistair kissed her forehead and pulled her tighter to him. He wondered what nightmare plagued her this time. Was it the darkspawn? Her parents? Him?

She would know soon enough. He whispered into the darkness, “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

Her eyelids fluttered open and she mumbled, “Did you say something?”

“Just thinking out loud. Go back to sleep.”

“Okay,” she yawned and closed her eyes once more.

**Author's Note:**

> I've always wondered about why Alistair waits so long to confess his bloodline, what dark pit formed at the bottom of his stomach, his thought process as his lover laid next to him and the guilt of keeping his secret kept him awake.


End file.
